As the ball continues, everything is totally fine and there is nothing to stress about.
As the ball continues, everything is totally fine and there is nothing to stress about.
Cast:
- Marathon Messenger is played by Penn Van Batavia. She can be found on Twitter at @acquiredchaste and in drag as horror king JOHN on Instagram at pennharper.itch.io.
- Cassidy Shard is played by Sydney Whittington. She is our wonderful editor. She’s also a contributing editor and occasional guest player for the Orpheus Protocol, a cosmic horror espionage actual play podcast. Find her on Twitter at @sydney_whitt.
- Emma Blackwood is played by Cameron Robertson. Find her on Twitter at @midnightmusic13 and on Instagram at @reading_and_dreaming. Cameron is also a player on Tabletop Squadron, a Star Wars Edge of the Empire actual play podcast.
- Birdie Foundling is played by Kit Adames. Find her on Twitter at @venusvultures. Kit is also a voice actor and writer on Elevator Pitch Podcast, a queer genre-hopping anthology podcast that can be accessed on Spotify and YouTube.
- Our GM and narrator is Nick Robertson. Find him on Twitter at @alias58. Nick is also the GM for Tabletop Squadron and can also be found as a player on the Orpheus Protocol.
Music & Sound Credits:
- This podcast features the musical talents of Dora Violet and Arne Parrott. You can find Dora at facebook.com/doraviolett. You can find Arne at atptunes.com.
- old radio Channel search sound effect by Garuda1982. Link & License.
- “Sekalaiset Miscellaneous » Sähköisiä räsähdyksiä / Electrical, short crackling, cracking, hissing sounds, like short-circuit, electric fault or electric shock, a close sound” by YleArkisto. Link & License.
- Shocked_Audience by unchaz. Link & License.
- Memories in Love (ID 1144) by Lobo Loco. Link & License.
- Death Valley (ID 1001) - Remastered by Lobo Loco. Link & License.
- White Atlantis by Sergey Cheremisinov. Link & License.
Art Credits:
- The official artwork for this podcast was created by Rashed AlAkroka, who can be found on Instagram and Artstation @rashedjrs.
Find Us Online:
- Our Website
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- Join our Patreon
- Join our Discord
A Knight of Shreds and Patches Transcript
Season 3 Episode 14: Can’t Resist a Good Blood Sport
Transcript by Cameron Robertson
Intro:
[hurdy gurdy music begins]
Nick: Welcome, listeners, to A Knight of Shreds and Patches. An immersive actual play podcast. This episode features the talents of –
Penn: Penn Van Batavia as Marathon Messenger and Gwendolyn Rozenthall.
Kit: Kit Adames as Birdie Foundling and Vaus Foundling.
Cameron: Cameron Robertson as Emma Blackwood and Janus Foundling.
Sydney: Sydney Whittington as Cassidy Shard and Winifred Foundling.
Nick: Nick Robertson as GM and Narrator.
Sydney: Hello listeners, this is your editor, Sydney, with today’s messages:
Famous American President William Henry Harrison once said the word “the”, and with that shining piece of wisdom in mind, I’d like to welcome you to this week’s edition of AKoSaP. We hope your imagination is as inspired as I am by that quote, and we’re always happy to read your words and even exchange them with you in our show’s discord server, linked in the show notes.
And if you want to hear us say the word “the”, and more, consider backing our Patreon, which gives you access to bonus episodes, campfire conversations, and other fun rewards.
And with that, we wrap up today’s announcements and head into Season 3, Episode 14: Can’t Resist a Good Blood Sport. And so…
“Join us, for now our tale to yours attaches
To carry hope: a Knight of Shreds and Patches.”
[hurdy gurdy music ends]
[electronic beeping]
[robotic powerup noise begins]
Distorted Robotic Voice: Power restored. Systems online. Reconfiguring audio connection.
[robotic powerup noise fades to radio frequency static]
[over radio]
Kit (as Birdie): Last time on a Knight of Shreds and Patches, we finished our deal up with Opal thanks to Marathon who decided to make Cassidy our driver for our team and I’m sure that Cassidy is going to be a great driver, but it was really fun seeing Marathon sweat over it. To celebrate our accomplishments we did a little bit of dancing. I got to talk a little bit with Emma’s uh, Rhy guy, and dance with someone that I’m a loose 72% sure that I know. I don’t know if I want to be right about that one though. And then of course um, if things couldn’t get any more interesting, Emma got challenged to a duel in the middle of the party. I know she’ll do well. She’ll do amazing. She’s Emma. Yeah. She’s gonna be great.
[radio static]
Episode Start:
Nick: The night is quiet and close out on the balcony outside of the masquerade ball. Down below amongst the well appointed, extremely expensive homes that are attempting to look rustic and failing stylishly, you can hear night insects singing and the gentle bustle of a community preparing to rest. And back in the ballroom, the party is going at full swing. Marathon and Cassidy, you find yourselves in a quiet spot with time to talk.
Penn (as Marathon): Miss Cassidy I never thought I'd see the day where you were the starlet of the party.
Sydney (as Cassidy): [this introvert has reached her people threshold] I didn't want to be. [sigh] Oh well. You - I apparently am going to be the world famous X Bike racer anyway, so may as well have people know who I am.
Penn (as Marathon): [awkward laugh] Yeah.
Penn: Marathon gives her a soft nudge with her shoulder.
Penn (as Marathon): Ah, sorry about that. I got a little carried away. But I know you'll do great. You're already great on the motorcycle. So.
Sydney (as Cassidy): Yeah.
Sydney: Cassidy takes a couple steps forward and leans out over the edge of the railing looking down onto the town with a couple of other couples out here having quiet conversations out of earshot.
Sydney (as Cassidy): From up here it's kind of pretty.
Penn (as Marathon): I'm sure that's why they built it all up here.
Sydney (as Cassidy): Yeah. Even if it kind of represents you know, the excess and what you can do if you don't care about the people that are all the levels under this, but
Penn (as Marathon): Yeah, being here is making me reflect a little on Tree All. I don't ever I don't know if I've ever looked at it through the lens that I'm seeing Sasnak through.
Sydney (as Cassidy): Not every city is like this, either. Eagle Hill was pretty good. Everyone had a voice.
Penn (as Marathon): How are you doing, by the way? Has - how are you dealing with being the starlet of the party? I guess, hiding out now, but
Sydney (as Cassidy): I was hot and sweaty. Now with the breeze, I'm actually slightly cold and all of my metal armor is not helping. So
Penn (as Marathon): Ah shoot!
Penn: Marathon starts sliding out of her jacket with the rolled up sleeves.
Penn (as Marathon): I have a jacket for this perfect moment. For this occasion. If you would like -
Sydney (as Cassidy): [interrupting] I don't need to steal your jacket.
Penn (as Marathon): I'm actually quite warm from dancing inside in a jacket, so
Sydney (as Cassidy): Okay.
Penn (as Marathon): If this would help warm you up, I would be happy to put it over your shoulders.
Sydney (as Cassidy): Sure.
Penn: Marathon very gently drapes the jacket over Cassidy's shoulders and then does a little playful brush of the shoulders before settling back to lean on the balconies railing. Underneath her jacket, she's got a set of that same iridescent stripe design in suspenders.
Sydney (as Cassidy): Those are kind of fun.
Penn (as Marathon): Yeah, I don't know. I was I was feeling a fun energy tonight. Ah, I haven't been able to dress up like this since Tree All, really. Since the big days.
Sydney (as Cassidy): Gala days?
Penn (as Marathon): Yeah.
Sydney (as Cassidy): Media parties or whatever.
Penn (as Marathon): Well it's nice to dress up a little bit. I miss some of this. But [laugh] the longer we're here the more I'm glad it's behind me. I do miss the dancing though.
Sydney (as Cassidy): Yeah, there's there's good stuff and there's bad stuff. Dancing is fun, but I mean, I don't I don't know if it's better or worse that no one's seeing my face. I don't have to try and look like I'm [laugh] caring about what they say.
Penn (as Marathon): Do you care? The statuesque Miss Cassidy cares about what they're saying about your dancin?
Sydney (as Cassidy): And while they're probably just like lavishing praise upon me for daring to do something different.
Penn (as Marathon): Where did you learn to dance like that, by the way?
Sydney (as Cassidy):
Mostly Mellow Tone. There's a lot of little stuff like in the Alpine Alliance, but I spent a lot of time in jazz clubs and it's kind of a transferable skill, especially if you're not trying to do the choreographed ones.
Penn (as Marathon): Bustin out some Mellow Tone on these stuffy Sasnakers.
Sydney (as Cassidy): Yeah, well you know, they're just from a small town. They've never seen a girl like me from the big city.
Penn (as Marathon): [chuckle] Are you feeling all right after the other day?
Sydney: Cassidy looks confused for a second.
Penn (as Marathon): Uh. [clears throat] The picnic? I just I just want to check in. I dunno.
Sydney (as Cassidy): Yeah, I’m… yeah.
Penn: Marathon flips so that now her elbows are on the railing and her back is facing the scenery.
Sydney: Cassidy gives a somewhat uncomfortable shrug but not a - more like she doesn't know what to say.
Penn (as Marathon): Are things - [stammer] I love taking you out on dates like that, I just want to make sure is that - are those kinds of things stuff you're interested in doing?
Sydney (as Cassidy): Yeah, no. That was, that was really fun. And I haven't really done that many, like, date date things. So
Penn (as Marathon): That is so hard for me to believe. But I mean, I can see it but like, you're such a catch so well, I -
Penn: Marathon puts a hand on our heart.
Penn (as Marathon): I vow to take you on as many cool dates as I possibly can, so that you get to experience all the cool dateness stuff.
Sydney (as Cassidy): [short laugh] Okay. Well, I appreciate your thoughtfulness and soon to be effort.
Penn (as Marathon): [laugh]
Sydney: And Cassidy leans her head on Marathon's shoulder for a second looking out across the rest of the dome and the people who either were not invited or who chose not to come who are starting to get ready for bed.
Penn (as Marathon): It's beautiful.
Penn: And Marathon is not looking at the scenery.
Sydney (as Cassidy): [sigh] I guess at some point, we probably need to go back in, huh?
Sydney: Cassidy turns to look up at Marathon and catches Marathon's eye contact.
Penn: Marathon freezes for a second.
Penn (as Marathon): I mean, I mean, we could stay out here a little longer. I'm, I'm sure Emma's got it handled.
Sydney (as Cassidy): Well you already talked to Opal so there's - all we have left to do is have fun anyway I suppose.
Penn (as Marathon): The question is, are you having more fun in there or out here?
Sydney: Cassidy~ I'm not sure if Marathon can tell but Cassidy's cheeks are pink inside her mask.
Sydney (as Cassidy): What a good question.
Nick: And we cut away from this close moment to Emma, who is inside. You are standing in a wide ring made of spectators of the most privileged and wealthy elite of Sasnak Traveling and in this moment, you can sense their desire for blood and violence as all of their attention fixates on you and your opponent that you have been forced into fighting. Atlas Bloodfeast, standing across from you, statuesque and giant, covered in muscles and holding a very heavy battle ax and Gwendolyn has finished intoning the rights of a formal duel and all that is left is for final checks and for you to be given the go ahead.
Penn (as Gwendolyn): Duelers, do you accept the laws of Sasnak and all the conflict resolution that combat entails?
Cameron (as Emma): Yes?
Nick: Atlas shakes his ax in acknowledgement.
Penn: Gwendolyn looks to Emma with a worried but resigned face.
Cameron: Emma's not looking super sure of what's going on, but
Kit: Birdie gives Emma two thumbs up and a definitely not nervous look.
Penn: Gwendolyn takes the sword from her back, sets it in between the two opponents.
Penn (as Gwendolyn): May the duel begin!
Penn: And she raises her sword back and steps away from the fighters ready to intervene if things get too crazy.
Nick: And Emma you hear the pounding footsteps of Atlas charging across the ring towards you. I need you to roll Initiative, please.
Cameron: Alright, so my Vigilance is two yellows.
[dice rolling]
Cameron: Three successes and a triumph.
Nick: Wow, really good. Atlas Bloodfeast has two yellows and a green for Initiative.
[dice rolling]
Cameron: Three successes, two advantages.
Nick: Okay. So that means you are going first and you also have a triumph if there's something about the room or this situation that you want to put in or create to be an advantage for you.
Cameron: So he is charging at me, can I use my triumph to watch him as he's running and identify a past injury as a weak point? Preferably like a knee?
Nick: Sure. I think that is a great idea.
Cameron: I would like him to have a weak knee please.
Nick: Yeah, he is not subtle in his approach, sprinting straight at you and you do notice that his gait on one side is not perfectly even and you recognize that from old farming injuries that your family has had in the past and you bet that that knee, if you were to hit it, would not hold up very well.
Cameron: Emma remains standing where she was as she watches him run towards her and analyzes his gait and then noticing the knee will, as he's getting fairly close, she'll raise her sword up to a actual defensive position and will step to the side and using the flat of the blade, take a baseball swing at the side of his knee.
Nick: Okay. Go ahead and roll that attack. Targeting a specific location will add a black die to the roll. And then also Atlas Bloodfeast is an Adversary and he does have one Defense, so that's an upgrade and another black die.
Cameron: Alright, and I am taking my blue die for Quick Strike because he hasn't gone yet. So for my Melee attack - actually, I'm going to flip a Story Point. So I am rolling three yellows, a blue, a purple, a red, and two blacks.
[dice rolling]
Cameron: That is four successes and two threats.
Nick: Okay, so the threats are going to be that after this attack you are left open, and he will get a couple blue die on his next attack. But otherwise, you are very successful and you hurt him quite a bit.
Cameron: So Emma takes the swing at his leg, which isn't as low as it would normally be given how tall he is. It's still - it's not a super low swing for her - and follows through with the swing as he continues past her. And the next time his - I'll say it's his left leg - comes stepping down, it gives slightly and shifts and he wobbles a little bit, and it doesn't look fun. There's a very satisfying crunch noise when it hits.
Nick: So how much damage is that?
Cameron: Well, I had four successes, my Brawn is three, and my great sword does four. So 11 damage.
Nick: Okay, even with his five Brawn, that's pretty good.
Cameron: And I will waive the Pierce 1 because I used the flat of the blade purposefully, so
Nick: Yeah, so Atlas bellows. His leg starts to give out a little but he stabilizes himself and he takes those couple of steps past you, and Emma, you put most of your weight into that swing, so it is difficult for you to recover as he does a back handed swing with his axe without even turning to face you, just doing it purely with arm strength to maximize how quickly he can try to capitalize on you having your feet planted. And while you swung with the flat of your blade, he is not. He is swinging with the edge of this ax straight at your head. So I need you to roll three greens, two yellow, and two blue please against average and if you have any Defense.
Cameron: I do have Defense. I have two Melee Defense, so that's two black die, and I'm going to suffer a Strain to use my Dodge talent to upgrade the difficulty of the combat check by one to make it a red and purple. So two yellow, three green, two blue, a red, a purple, and two black.
[dice rolling]
Cameron: Okay, so no successes or failures, but a triumph and a despair.
Nick: What the fuck!? Great. Okay. So with no successes, Atlas isn't able to hit you, but with the triumph, he does hook the blade of your sword and is able to pull it from your grasp and fling it away. Unfortunately for him with that despair, in the midst of that maneuver, you are also able to use that momentum to pull the ax from his hands and both of your weapons are thrown to the edge of the ring. And Atlas gives a grunt of surprise, nods to you in acknowledgment of your skill, and then puts up both of his hands into a boxing stance ready to continue. There is a loud gasping from the crowd as everything gets more exciting immediately and several people have to jump out of the way of large flying weapons and you're up Emma.
Kit (as Birdie): [yelling] Punch him in the dick, Emma!
Cameron: Which weapon ended up closest to me where I don't have to pass this guy to get to it?
Nick: Do you want to use his ax to show that you're cool or do you want your sword back to show that you're cool?
Cameron: Whichever one.
Nick: Okay, I will flip a coin heads is sword, tails is ax. It is tails. The way the weapons were thrown, the ax is ended up on the perimeter of your side of the ring and your sword is somewhere over Atlas' shoulder.
Cameron: So Emma now without her sword looks quickly around this open area that they're fighting in and sees the ax on her side and looks back at Atlas with is hands up and ready to do some punchin' and raises her hands as if she is down for this new boxing match they found themselves in and then quickly does a spin kick into his left knee and then takes off towards the ax.
Nick: All right, roll that Brawl check, please.
Cameron: I don't have my blue die this time, but my Brawl is the same as my Melee. So
[dice rolling]
Cameron: No successes or failures, but a triumph and two advantages.
Nick: Um~. [why does Cameron keep rolling these weird rolls?]
Cameron: So I don't make contact with my kick, but can it catch him off guard and cause him to shift in a way to either protect that knee or shift forgetting that that knee was injured and delay him that way?
Nick: Yeah.
Cameron: Something to give him a disadvantage when he comes after Emma now.
Nick: Okay, with that roll Emma, as you go to kick that knee again, Atlas lifts the leg to catch the kick on the inside of his shin instead, but he was not expecting the amount of force that you were able to put into that kick. He's beginning to respect you as an opponent, but it takes a lot of momentum to knock him off balance and he's just not used to it, so your kick is powerful enough to rotate him away from you and throw him off balance again. So you take that moment, he's not able to react as you dash backwards towards that ax. And as you get to it, you notice that this rich ponce who has instigated this entire situation is standing just over the ax with his feet on it and he is already winding up to punch you when you bend over to get it, assuming that you're not going to see, but he is drunk enough and bad enough at combat that it is extremely obvious to you that that's what he's going to do. So if you would like, you can use your triumph to avoid that, get the ax, and take any more interference from this guy out of the equation.
Cameron: Okay, so Emma sees the punch that will be coming and quickly grabs the ax and does a pull like it's a tablecloth off of a table and she's a magician and the mean drunk old rich man topples backwards.
Nick: He falls with a heavy bang. And anybody who was looking in that direction knows exactly what was happening and Emma, you're not quite sure what duel protocol is, but you're pretty sure that that's gonna go badly for him long term.
Cameron: And I didn't touch him, so I'm pretty sure I maintained any rules that I don't know about.
Nick: Mhm. And there's already disgruntled grumbling coming from that portion of the crowd and people starting to gather around that guy. And we are over to Atlas. He is worried about his leg, he does not have his ax, there is a sword somewhere behind him. So Emma you have proven already that you are a match for Atlas in bladed combat - that you can at least hold your own. But no matter how strong you are, this guy is just bigger than you and as you turn around holding the ax, you see that he is charging back towards you empty handed and is going to try to grab you in a lock that keeps the ax close enough to both of you that you can't swing it and he is probably going to try to break something or choke you out and just tried to remove weapons from the equation. So he is going to be attacking you with a Brawl check which is again three greens and two yellows and I'm going to be flipping a Story Point back to upgrade that to three yellows and two greens.
Cameron: Alright and I'm going to spend another Strain to Dodge to upgrade the difficulty. I have two Melee Defense so he has two black die and he has two black die from the advantages that Emma got.
[dice rolling]
Cameron: A despair and an advantage.
Nick: [groan] That sucks. So with the advantage Emma, he's in close enough that swigging this big ax is going to be harder, so you will have a black die on your next roll, but he isn't able to really grab you and Atlas' employer on his back being surrounded by people who have seen him be dishonorable, begins to yell instructions at him. And you could see from the look on his face that he does not want to listen to these instructions, but that he has to. So this rich guy is saying,
Nick (as Aubergine): Kill her now Atlas! There's no time for this, just finish her. Don't do any of that grappling, just kill her.
Nick: And so Atlas who was reaching for your arms to try to lock them out and maybe disarm you, has to stop halfway through that and starts trying to punch you in the face and knock you out and it takes too long and you are able to avoid it and his strategy is bad now and that is the despair. And that is a good point as this fight is entering the next phase to check in on Birdie. Birdie you helped prepare for the duel and this crowd is extremely distracted and Emma appears to be doing well. What are you doing right now?
Kit: Birdie quote unquote, "helping Emma prepare" is a very loose sense. She definitely knows that Emma has this under control, no matter how nervous she can be about the situation. Over the course of the fight, she's started to say encouragement or give directions and then she goes,
Kit (as Birdie): [to self] Oh,oh. She's got it. Okay. Okay.
Kit: And will cheer whenever Emma does something impressive - or really just does anything at all. She's just being supportive right now. But as she watches more and more of the attendants center their focus around the duel, she realizes that this is a very good chance to maybe cause a few problems without there being as many people there to notice. So have all the councilors left their posts? Are they where they were at? Does she see them joining the crowd?
Nick: Yep. So Opal has maintained her position at the high table where she was seated with her lackeys. Most of the lackeys have left and are joined into the crowd. Most of the councilors, some of what you know by name, some of which you don't, have also mixed into the crowd. You get the impression most of the elite just can't resist a good blood sport and so they're mixed in with people without as much social standing, yelling and screaming and being a lot less dignified than they were before. You do notice that Councilor Wander is back behind the high table standing on the stairs that lead up to the podium. He's not all the way up to the podium, so he has a little more height than most. He is watching the fight, but also appears to be talking to one of the people he came in with and is much more removed from the group.
Kit: Would she be able to tell from this vantage point that if she began to approach Wander if Opal would be able to see her? She doesn't want Opal to see her making any sort of attempt to fraternize with the enemy.
Nick: Yeah, so there's those two semi circular staircases that lead up to the podium. One of them is directly in Opal's line of sight, the one that Wander is standing on but Wander's back behind her. So if you went straight for him, you would absolutely pass in between her and Wander and if she cared at all about what you were doing, she would see what was going on. If you take the long way around behind her, there is a another staircase, you would have to go up the staircase past the podium and back down to get to Wander. So depending on how focused he is on the fight, he may notice you coming or may not, but you would probably be able to avoid Opal's line of sight unless for some reason she peered all the way back behind her. It will take longer to get over that way in a subtle way, but you could do it.
Kit: Alright, she's going to start a casual and not rushed path around the long way to go and see what councilor Wander is up to. And yeah, sure, why not. She'll take a second to see if anyone's got a well placed wallet or purse that she can maybe get a little bag of triangles out of.
Nick: Sure. So that'll be two separate checks. First one will be Skullduggery to see if you can identify an easy target and pickpocket them. I think in this situation, you're not going to fail at pickpocketing somebody since it's a a secondary objective, so the success of this roll is just do you find somebody that it will be easy to steal from, and then the second role will be Stealth, just to work through the crowd in a way that is unobtrusive. Unless you do really poorly, you're not going to get caught, but it is how quickly you can make it there.
Kit: Okay, so my ranking in Agility is four. Skullduggery is a rank three.
Nick: Okay, so that's three yellows and a green and this is going to be hard difficulty, but you will get a blue die because everybody is very distracted right now.
Kit: So that is three yellows, one green, three purple, and one blue. One success and three advantages.
Nick: Great. Would you prefer cash or jewelry?
Kit: Cash.
Nick: Okay. There are people with heavy money purses hanging off of their outfits in a show of wealth, but you know if you steal one of those, that that's going to create a big stir. So on your way through the crowd, you're able to check a few pockets and get two triangles worth of money from various people, which is a lot, but not nearly as much in Sasnak where everything is so expensive.
Kit: She'll take what she can get. Can she use one of the advantages to start a whisper campaign that people are starting to take bets on Emma?
Nick: You could use that as an advantage to do that. That is going to be as Streetwise check to start manipulating a group of bloodthirsty people.
Kit: I'll just start it. [giggle] She'll start chanting Emma's name from the back of the crowd and hope that it makes its way up.
Nick: Yeah. And it gets picked up pretty quickly. That is also assisted by Emma has been more successful than Atlas in every exchange so far, so people are pretty excited to cheer for the winning team.
Kit: She just wants more distraction.
Nick: It's working.
Kit: Perfect.
Nick: And then that Stealth check is going to be a hard as well, but it'll be two blue die because you have upped the distraction level by having people chant for Emma.
Kit: And Stealth is also a rank three, so it's the same. So that is, again, three yellows, one green, two blue, and three purples. One success, three advantages and a triumph.
Nick: Great! You are able to make your way pretty quickly across the room. Not the fastest that you could have moved if things had gone more in your favor, but a lot of lucky things seem to happen along the way.
Kit: So Birdie has managed to, in the most fluid manner that she possibly can while wearing still quite a big costume that drags along the floor, she's tried to move through the crowd in a way that people don't really care who's in front of them as long as they move past them quickly. So she's used the outer ring of the crowd to hide her movements towards Wander without picking up attention from the woman she just made a deal with. Are there still people carrying trays of champagne around? Are they all watching the duel?
Nick: There's not a lot of people walking around because everyone's attention is on one spot, but there are definitely people watching the fight scattered through the crowd holding trays of champagne still at attention because they are all very well trained.
Kit: She'll take two flutes of champagne off of the tray that's closest to the end of her path and will try to set up near Wander in a way that she's not immediately near to them, but hopefully well enough within earshot. And she'll try to keep up this ruse that she's waiting for someone to come and meet her there and she's holding on to a flute of champagne for that person and try to look around as if she's watching for whoever's coming to meet her while leaning into Wander's conversation.
Nick: Are you good with your triumph being that you get a juicy bit of information listening?
Kit: Yes.
Nick: Okay. You are able to do that. You find a spot on the opposite staircase far enough up that you're across from Wander and out of his line of sight. He's partially focused on the duel happening down below but seems mostly engaged with speaking with what you determine pretty quickly is his secretary, his assistant, somebody who goes and does things or gets things for Wander, definitely taking orders, and you catch a piece of this conversation as you set up. Wander is telling his secretary
Nick (as Wander): Yes we bought out that idiot Carbon's contract for a reason. Don't forget, we want the trophy from the championship. Stupid that's something that powerful is used as a bobble for sport for the masses. We will collect it, we will use it, and Sasnak Traveling will be ours.
Nick: And much of what follows from there as you continue to listen, Birdie, is discussion of business maneuvering and resource management that without context doesn't make a ton of sense to you. And as you continue to listen, hoping for more nuggets of information, we will jump over to Winifred and Janus who are working on making their escape from their backstage heist.
Sydney (as Winifred): [over radio] All right Janus. It's about as safe as I think it's going to be. I've gotten the gradient descent as tight as it's gonna get. I dunno. Should be good.
Cameron (as Janus): [over radio] All righty~! [focusing exhale]
Cameron: Janus is in her superhero kneeling pose to give herself the most sturdy platform to land back on.
Cameron (as Janus): [over radio] You know, I always think this is a good idea and then as soon as I actually like, need to press the button, I get really nervous about it.
Sydney (as Winifred): [over radio] Well what's the worst that could happen?
Cameron (as Janus): [over radio] Juno could be right.
Sydney (as Winifred): [over radio] [shudder]
Cameron (as Janus): [over radio] And I can't have that be true.
Sydney (as Winifred): [over radio] Well, he can't be more right than both of us together.
Sydney: On Winifred's screen is a lot of what looks like complicated matrix math.
Cameron (as Janus): [over radio] [sigh] Okay, it's fine. What could go wrong? Anyway um... I'll be there in a sec.
Cameron: And Janus engages the glitch.
Nick: So mechanically, this glitching ability that the Foundlings have discovered works most of the time, but occasionally it has pretty inconvenient effects, and very rarely, it has dangerous effects, which is why Juno says that you shouldn't be doing it Janus. So I need you to roll me a D 20 and let me know if you get a one or two, otherwise it works as expected.
Cameron: All righty.
[die rolling]
Cameron: I got a 17.
Nick: Okay, so the glitch works exactly as you and Winifred had hoped it would. What does it look like as you glitch out of the place that you're stuck?
Cameron: So as Janus engages the glitch, even though this room isn't super colorful, it's fairly bland, the color that does exist seems to drain slightly. And Janus pixels out in a combination of sparkling pixels and TV static and the lights dip slightly, and when they come back to full strength, Janus is no longer in that room.
Sydney: As Janus hits the button and the glitch occurs, on Winifred’s screen, the sets of variables representing the environmental conditions and the contents of the circuitry of nearby electronics down to improbable levels showing both Winifred its current level of access and the potential number of variables that go into making sure that this works. The lights in the destination room also dim and Winifred's tablet, the screen goes black, but only along one axis almost like she was looking at it through polarized glasses and rotated it wrong. And with an electric snap, Janus appears in the storeroom holding the same sense that she had left her previous room and, and Winifred breathes a sigh of relief that nothing has gone wrong this time.
Cameron: As soon as Janus feels solid ground beneath her again she pops up - just in case she didn't end up in the correct location and needed to be able to react quickly. [laugh]
Sydney (as Winifred): Watch out for that shelf!
Cameron (as Janus): Oh, it's okay. I'm too short to hit it. [laugh]
Sydney (as Winifred): Ah perks of the posture - perks of the height?
Cameron (as Janus): [highly offended] Posture?
Sydney (as Winifred): If you're hunched you're even shorter.
Cameron (as Janus): I have very good posture, excuse you.
Sydney: Winifred powers down the tablet and starts reaching down to get the parts of Janus' masquerade costume to start helping her back into them.
Cameron: As Winifred is prepping the dress to be stepped into, Janus is looking over mostly her arms and upper torso - the pieces of clothing that remained on and will still be seen once she puts the dress back on to make sure that there is minimal dust and anything sticking to her from her adventures in the vents. And is patting herself off and brushing off whatever dust she finds.
Sydney (as Winifred): Just like we practiced except for the whole having to glitch and not being able to come back out the way that Juno should have let us come out.
Cameron (as Janus): Mhm.
Sydney (as Winifred): [sigh]
Cameron (as Janus): [sigh] It's fine. I will I will I will be paying a visit to our dear sibling.
Sydney (as Winifred): Yeah. Hey he did help.
Cameron (as Janus): Mhm.
Sydney (as Winifred): They did contribute to the cause.
Cameron (as Janus): Yep.
Sydney (as Winifred): I how likely do you think it is that anyone's going to stumble across that in the vents? Do we need to go back up for it?
Cameron (as Janus): No, highly unlikely. With the amount of dust that was there, and the general size of the vents, I don't I don't think there's a lot of people spending much time there and also, it, it blends in. It's just it's a metal box within wires. It looks intentional.
Sydney (as Winifred): Yeah, fair enough.
Sydney: From outside the door they hear the gasp of reaction to events that are occurring. And Winifred turns her head quickly.
Sydney (as Winifred): Uh~. Sounds like events are occurring outside. That's -
Cameron (as Janus): Okay. Get me into the dress. Come on, come on, come on.
Sydney (as Winifred): Yup.
Sydney: And Winifred works - holding the wings out of the way and gets Janus zipped up.
Cameron: Janus replaces all of the technology that she had smuggled in back into their hiding places.
Sydney: And Winifred hands the tablet to be stowed away as well.
Sydney (as Winifred): All right, our job is done. Let's see what people are excited about. And hopefully it's not us. It shouldn't be. We're professionals.
Cameron (as Janus): Do I look normal?
Cameron: Janus does a medium fast spin.
Sydney: Winifred licks a finger and rubs off a small piece of makeup that had made an escape attempt during Janus' traversal.
Sydney (as Winifred): Okay, yeah. You look good.
Cameron (as Janus): Oh, gross.
Sydney (as Winifred): [laugh] What you -this is not the first time I've helped put your makeup on or take it off.
Cameron (as Janus): No, I know. I'm just - I'm used to being the one who's sharing the germs in that way now, with the twins. It's - that hasn't happened to me in a while. [laugh]
Sydney (as Winifred): Well that's -
Cameron (as Janus): Ew.
Sydney (as Winifred): [laugh] That's what happens when you have me around. You know, I just love sharing my saliva everywhere.
Cameron (as Janus): Mm. I know you do, but I don't particularly want to share, sister. [laugh]
Sydney (as Winifred): Well, you're good now.
Cameron (as Janus): Okay. Thank you. Let's go.
Sydney: And Winifred turns and holds the door open for her dear sister.
Nick: You are able to make your way back towards the ballroom and as you get closer, the sounds of excitement and violence get louder. And as Janus and Winifred make their way back to the party, we cut back to Marathon and Cassidy on the balcony, who are finding it harder and harder to ignore it the rising commotion from the ballroom.
Penn: Marathon had been framing Cassidy with her arms on the railings of the balcony and her shoulders rise up as she hears a clattering sound coming from inside.
Penn (as Marathon): [sigh]
Penn: And she just takes a breath out and shakes her head like she's just trying to ignore.
Sydney (as Cassidy): I think it might be suspicious if we're not back in there with all the racket.
Penn (as Marathon): [groan] Yeah. Trying not to get involved in any fights. That was like one of the one rules Janus and Winifred gave us. But
Sydney (as Cassidy): Yeah, I mean, I appreciate your unwillingness to fight, but us going back in to see what's going on doesn't mean we have to.
Penn (as Marathon): Right.
Sydney (as Cassidy): Like I don't - you know, it's probably just like two rich people throwing glasses at each other or something.
Penn (as Marathon): You know what? Yeah, yeah, that makes sense. That probably is the most likely situation. I will refrain from any temptation to be involved, so
Sydney (as Cassidy): Maybe they'll drop a chandelier on someone.
Penn (as Marathon): Oh, I would actually love to see - that chandelier looked sick and heavy as hell. So
Sydney (as Cassidy): Yeah actually, if it's that if it's super heavy, maybe I don't want to see that.
Penn: Marathon turns to push down the handle of the balcony doors. And as they swing out, what is the chaotic scene before them?
Cameron: So the scene that Cassidy and Marathon happen upon within the open space where the duel is taking place, is they see the back of an extremely tall gentleman, and then see Emma come sliding underneath him holding a very large battleax and popping back up and facing him now being more in the center of the space rather than right up against the spectators.
Penn (as Marathon): Are -
Sydney: Cassidy has a giant grimace inside of her mask. [laugh]
Penn (as Marathon): Should we step back out onto the balcony?
Sydney (as Cassidy): [groan] I - this is - ahhh.
Penn (as Marathon): I mean, it looks like she's got it. Like, I'm not getting involved.
Sydney (as Cassidy): Yeah but don't we have a duty to make sure that we try and step in if she's about to get like, beheaded?
Penn (as Marathon): I guess. Is this - is this the duel? Are we allowed? I mean obviously yes it if I- fuck duels if if Emma is about to die for real, but like
Sydney: Cassidy starts shoving her way through the crowd looking for Gwendolyn to tell her what the heck is going on.
Penn (as Marathon): I did not expect Emma to get in the fight.
[hurdy gurdy music swells]
Outro:
Penn (as Marathon): Welcome back folks, you’re tuned to Going the Distance: Traveler’s Guide on road dial 1558. That’s a wrap on today’s log and we’re set to loop after these considerations. Further detail for the following is cataloged in the show notes.
This has been A Knight of Shreds and Patches, an actual play podcast using the Genesys game system from Fantasy Flight Games. The show is edited by Sydney Whittington, and features the talents of:
Kit Adames as Birdie. Kit can be found on Twitter and Instagram @ venusvultures. Kit is also a voice actor for Elevator Pitch Podcast, a queer genre-hopping anthology podcast that can be accessed on Spotify and YouTube.
Penn Van Batavia as Marathon. She can be found on Twitter @ acquiredchaste and in drag as horror king JOHN on Instagram @ john.is.risen. Penn is an indie TTRPG designer whose most recent work includes SLICE IT OUT, a grisly carving RPG about cutting pieces of yourself out to fit in. Check out faer other work at pennharper.itch.io.
Sydney Whittington as Cassidy. Sydney can be found on our Discord server, which is linked in the show notes, and on Twitter @ sydney_whitt. She’s also a contributing editor and occasional guest player for the Orpheus Protocol, a cosmic horror espionage actual play podcast.
Cameron Robertson as Emma. Cameron can be found on Twitter @ midnightmusic13 and on Instagram @ reading_and_dreaming. Cameron is also a player on Tabletop Squadron, a Star Wars Edge of the Empire actual play podcast.
And Nick Robertson as narrator. Nick can be found on Twitter @ alias58. Nick is also the GM for Tabletop Squadron. Nick can also be found as a player on the Orpheus Protocol.
This podcast features the musical talents of Dora Violet and Arne Parrott. You can find Dora at facebook.com/doraviolett. You can find Arne at atptunes.com.
The official artwork for this podcast was created by Rashed AlAkroka, who can be found on Instagram and Artstation @ rashedjrs.
You can follow the Patina on Twitter @ akosap_podcast or visit the website: www.akosap.com. To further support the show, consider joining the Patreon at www.patreon.com/AKoSaP, where we’ll be bringing you weekly content including bonus episodes, campfire conversations, and other fun rewards.
Until you tune back…
…stay bold and stay kind